The mind of a child, so gentle and free Slow down for awhile and like them you’ll see. The glass is half full, the milk doesn’t spill You can do all you desire, if you make it your will. Happiness comes from a picnic in the park Your Scooby-Doo light that glows in the dark. Your mom takes your hand and she holds you tight Love so devoted, she doesn’t let you out of sight. Life knocks you down, but you get up and go Unscathed by the world, your feelings show. You speak your mind and you stand up tall You can be anything you want; you can have it all. Somewhere along the journey your path gets cut And in your face, a door slammed shut. You lose yourself as you find your way Sometimes you’re alone at the end of the day. At times there is sorrow, but joy comes around Nothing more precious than a child’s sound. A little laugh will carry you through despair A small hug show how much that they care. Soon you’ll remember what it was like Trading your tricycle in for a bike. Eating ice cream as it dripped down your face Crossing the line as you finish a race. When it’s not life that matters but what matters in life You’ll begin to see the joy turned from strife. Tears will fall less often, you’ll become a fighter The dreary days you have will become much brighter. So live and let loose, go a little wild Just don’t forget what it was like to be a child.
~ Jennifer R. W. Vargas
May 11, 2009
May we be reminded in these times that life can still hold so many possibilities. Dreams can still be attainable and there is hope still to be found.
One of the greatest gifts a dad can give to their child, is just being present in their life. The time dads spend with their children does not go unnoticed. Dad’s can be so fun and full of energy and life. Strong enough to lift you over their head and fast enough to chase you around. Brave enough to go on camping trips and adventurous enough to take you on hikes and go fishing.
They say that being a daddy’s girl is one of the greatest things. A man who sets an example of how to be strong yet gentle, firm but kind. Having an unbreakable bond with a dad is so important. Not everyone has that, so if you do, treasure it. Be kind to those who have lost it, for it’s a pain that is hard to bear.
If there’s anything we’ve learned over this last year, it’s how not to take things and people for granted. The time we get to spend with them. The memories we have shared and the hard ways we have had to say goodbye to some of the most important people in our lives.
I know some incredibly strong young women personally who have lost their dads over this last year, and even more before then. I hope this poem I wrote inspired by one of those special young ladies, helps more of you to heal who have lost that irreplaceable man in your life.
I want to encourage you to keep those memories alive, in any way possible. They might even make you feel closer to your dad, even though he is physically no longer with you.
Photo used with permission
Daddy’s Girl
Nothing can quite explain the emptiness of you not being here Each day I wake up and have to relive my worst fear. I think about something, I instantly have to share I pick up the phone, then remember you’re not there. Who am I supposed to call when my car breaks down? Who will intimidate my new boyfriend when I bring him around? Who is going to tell the jokes, no one else thinks are funny? Or give me advice on how to invest my money? What about those weekend trips we spent out by the lake? And all the father-daughter memories I’m supposed to make? What do I do when Father’s Day comes each June? Or when people expect me to move on, but it feels too soon? When will the days not seem quite as tough? My time with you was simply not enough. I’m not sure how to move forward, without feeling such grief Or be mad that cancer took you from me like a thief. I’ll try to remember all the memories we’ve shared And how lucky I was, to have a dad that really cared. The memories we’ve shared, won’t be hard to find I’ve engraved each one, so they will be fresh on my mind. There still will be times, where more tears are shed, But I’ll try not to lose sight of all the life I have ahead. The lessons I’ve learned will shape the life I lead, I know you’d want me to live a full life and succeed. I’ll look after mom, she’s still in good hands And we’ll still include you in all of our plans. We’ll visit you often and talk every day And laugh as we imagine exactly what you’d say. Know that I love you and that I’ll always remember The wonderful memories we’ve experienced together. You’ll always be with me; I’ll carry you in my heart And even though it seems like it, we won’t feel that far apart. I’ll find the strength I need, please know that I’ll be fine And I’ll forever be thankful that you were once mine.
I woke up this morning hoping it was all a bad dream I know it’s real by the tears that continuously stream. The worst thing imaginable is now my reality “I’m sorry” didn’t matter, it’s simply a deaf plea. I asked for forgiveness, but received none Now my presence, is one you must shun. I work through these feelings, so that I might heal One day it won’t be so hard to feel what I feel. I’m working through the grief and what came to an end I know in my heart, there is nothing left to mend. Shattered and broken, not meant to be Yet I won’t forget what you’ve given to me. A new found perspective, areas in which to grow Maintaining boundaries, friendships to forgo. I can still be blessed by someone’s existence, Appreciate and respect them from a distance. Not everyone is meant to be a permanent part of my life Emotions need to be kept in check and not run rife. I cannot look to people to provide more to me than allowed I don’t need their approval, of myself, I must be proud. I can be a blessing to them, without going over the top I must set limits for myself and know when to stop. It will always be hard not to matter to someone you care for Yet there is always someone waiting, who will love you more. Trust for whatever reason, that it wasn’t meant to last Try to move forward and leave that relationship in the past. Don’t change who you are, just who you cling to There are others around who will see you through. Keep your heart open, others love you for who you are Learn from this heartbreak, don’t let it leave a scar.
tHaM That’s what I see when I look down A bunch of mess all around. I can’t say it was my best friend The countless numbers never end. I am being forced to take this class I hope I can get out of it fast. This may sound mean but it is very hard I just don’t see math in my cards. Jumbled up confusion makes my head spin I feel like a loser, this battle I can’t win. So hopefully soon I can say goodbye I really don’t like math, I’m sorry I can’t lie. I’m glad others do, we need to be taught The more a teacher enjoys it, we can learn a lot. Math isn’t for everyone, I don’t think it is for me It won’t help what I do or what I want to be. I am at a loss for words, I can’t say more When one is closed, there’s always an open door.
~ Jennifer R. W. Vargas
November 2004
A silly poem about my dislike for Math before dropping out of Algebra II. Age 17
There are many beautiful flowers in the garden Clay pots that can crack once they harden. The sun and the soil help them to grow Water seeps into their roots, so their petals will show. Nature is in charge of the seasons; when they bloom When put on display, they enhance every room. Their petals will wilt without proper care Tend to the garden and their beauty you will share. When a rose bud blooms, there is no greater sight It’s thorns proof, it’s prepared for the fight. Behold the sunflower, that grows and stands so tall No matter nature’s force, she will never fall. Strong winds may come and the storms crash in They’re more than “A summer thing til it goes out of fashion.” The Bannenite is sturdy, can withstand more than you’d think She doesn’t wilt in the sun, nor the water make her shrink. Her leaves are radiant, she’s known for her hue She doesn’t need much tending, she knows what to do. You won’t need to dress her up with baby’s breath sprigs Or worry about her delicacy when arranged next to twigs. She can stand on her own, or be added to a bouquet Her beauty never lost amongst a large display. If given the chance, she will enhance every arrangement She’ll flourish with each opportunity for engagement. For as much love as you give her, she will return For another kind of flower, you will not yearn. You’ll take pride in knowing you invested and cared And in her beauty and growth you will have shared.
~ Jennifer R. W. Vargas
July 2016
For Kelleigh Bannen, who I’ll always love and support.
